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| Good luck, vets. Try not to die this time |
The cast for Philippines is out! Not gonna lie, I'm a little disappointed. A lot of these females look like the dumb follower type...probably cast to give the veterans the best possible chance of survival. But there are some bright spots and first impressions are largely useless.
First of all, the three returnees all get the thumbs up from me. Jonathan Penner is an all-time favorite of mine, he is constantly making the game interesting whilst being hilarious and bitchy, and the other two are both cool guys that were cut before their time, rather than overexposed "all-stars". There's something fascinating about bringing back a player who's had a 12 year absence from the game. Can he adapt to the new twists? If you're going to have returnees, then this is as solid a theme as any - bring back people who didn't finish the game properly the first time.
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| Roxanne rocks! |
When she said she was in the army reserve, that was one of the few things that made me perk up and go "oh, cool". I'm definitely going to keep an eye on her, she has the most interesting backstory and could go far if she's made of real steel. There's a good chance I could be wrong and she turns out to be a dud, but I'm ranking her high for now.
2. Denise Stapley, the feminist [Matsing]
It's good to have a strong, badass woman on the show again and I loved the way she called out the "Playboy models" on her tribe. She's hilarious and I have high hopes for her.
3. Zane Knight, the redneck [Matsing]
I was immediately drawn to this guy and don't really have much to justify his high placement. I think it's just because he looks different. He just has an amusing naivete about him that I find adorable. Unintentional laughs abound!
4. Artis Silvester, the black guy [Tandang]
Looks like one of the stand out characters of the season, for sure. He's going to be a Phillip, but without Phillip levels of obnoxiousness. A likeable eccentric, like Huggy Bear.
5. Malcolm Freberg, the frat boy [Matsing]
I get mild douche vibes for Malcolm, but that's OK. At least he had a few witty things to say to make him stand out in a largely uninspiring cast.
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| Let's dance! |
6. Abi-Maria Gomes, party girl [Tandang]
Great energy, sexy accent, but I don't think she'll have much game. "I think people are going to be very excited about looking at me and they're going to be inspired by me" she says, in adorable broken English. Inspired? No. But I'm sure I'll be excited about looking at her.
7. Sarah Dawson, sassy chick [Kalabaw]
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| My eyes are up here |
8. Lisa Whelchel, the actress [Tandang]
I guess she could be fun, or maybe not. The nice, quiet old lady usually ends up just being a passenger in the game.
9. Katie Hanson, the bitch [Kalabaw]
Another Pageant girl! "I can already tell she's going to be a bitch" says Abi. She seems full of herself, but I didn't get troublemaker vibes. Although when your fellow castmate is already looking to hate you, you must be doing something right.
10. Dana Lambert, the lesbian [Kalabaw]
She seems laid-back and cool, but not a lot of fun. She lacks the competitive drive to do well in this game. Apparently she's not here for the money, but for the experience. Yawn. I could be wrong, but it seems like she's probably only on the show because she's a lesbian.
11. Jeff Kent, the baseball star [Kalabaw]
He wasn't in the cast video much, they seem to be banking on you already knowing who he is and what he's like. Which I do not. Baseball isn't my sport (making love's my sport).
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| RC gives Pete the brush-off |
12. Roberta "RC" Saint-Amour, the glamour girl [Tandang]
A lot of these women are just blending together for me. She seems very glamorous and will probably struggle with the jungle life.
13. Pete Yurkowski, pretty boy [Tandang]
I didn't even remember this guy after looking him up. That can't be good. Seems like the usual bland alpha male that'll win a few challenges and make mid-jury.
"I will win Survivor because I'm awesome". With an argument like that, how can you doubt her? She then proceeded to spout off a bunch of generic phrases which will probably be hilarious in retrospect when she inevitably fails to live up to them. Another contestant whose bra size is higher than her IQ.
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| Nothing between the ears, plenty below them |
15. Carter Williams, surfer boy [Kalabaw]
Oookay, so his dumb hairstyle is because his girlfriend has free reign over it? Sounds like he's set to be the most pussy-whipped contestant in the show's history. These girls are gonna chew him up and spit him out.
